#70: Love is Stronger than Pride

A Review of Ties That Tether by Jane Igharo

In Ties That Tether, Jane Igharo weaves a beautiful tale of interracial romance, cross-cultural relations, family, and choice. Published in 2020, it is the author’s debut novel. Set in Toronto, Canada, it follows Azere, who is caught between a promise she made to her father on his deathbed and following her own desires by choosing to be with Rafael.

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Today’s newsletter is a guest feature by Doyin, a lover of all things art—literature, music, paintings, and movies. You can mostly find him reading, writing, or daydreaming about the Corleone family. He's addicted to cakes, books, and suits. He writes from Lagos and tweets @AjayiAdedoyin14

Azere’s simple life is complicated by a one-night stand that leaves her navigating the waters of a cross-cultural romance, which estranges her from her mother, Itohan. As she battles her attraction to Rafael, she struggles to find her voice among the many others ringing in her ears.

She grapples with either following her heart or fulfilling a long-standing promise, and tries to stick to her family and find her voice. A huge marker in this story is Azere’s trust in her own instincts and taking the initiative in matters that affect her directly. Her journey to self-discovery is a subtle part of the plot as she finds her voice and follows the beat of her heart rather than dancing to her mother’s tunes.

On the other hand, while Rafael is more willing to take a gamble on their relationship although he’s battling with his demons. He’s reeling with guilt from the death of his wife and unborn child, which leads him to self-imposed isolation and inner turmoil.

“Frankly, I had no intention to date. I was minding my business in a hotel lounge when I saw Azere drinking alone at a bar. Her mere presence highlighted all the inadequacies in my life and made me utterly aware of the loneliness I had forced myself to grow comfortable with.”

A theme Jane Igharo subtly inserts in the story is fate. In spite of Itohan’s endless and exasperating efforts to ensure her daughter ends up with an Edo man, Azere and Rafael are inexplicably drawn to each other. Their meeting, unexpectedly working together, and Azere’s continued (yet futile) efforts to rid her mind of him all point to events orchestrated by an invisible hand that brought them together regardless of their desires. The characters find what they want, in ways they don’t expect, from whom they least expect it. There’s a sense of serendipity seemingly following Azere and Rafael.

I felt it too – that pull. In fact, I feel it now. It’s as if the ends of one string are lassoed around our hearts – mine to one and his to the other – and we can’t part from each other. Rather, we are pulled to each other.

Igharo’s writing confronts the struggle immigrants face while immersing themselves into their new culture, while staying true to their origins. We see this in Azere’s struggle to reconcile her adoption of Canadian culture with her Nigerian origins. The struggles of interracial romance and cross-cultural relationships are also highlighted in this stirring novel.

I also found the title encompassing the major parts of the novel. The major threads of the story are Azere and Rafael’s bond and family ties, hence the title, Ties That Tether. The use of dialogue borrowed from romance movies is as mushy as can be, perhaps pointing to the author as a romance movie enthusiast. Nonetheless, I found Ties That Tether to be an interesting novel, one I could read again.

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Have you read this book? What did you think about it? Leave a comment, maybe? 😊

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