#42: Beyond the Checklist: One Woman's Wild Ride
A Review of Amaka Azie's It Started With "I Don't"
It Started With “I Don’t” tells the story of a young woman, Anuli, who had her life all planned out. Go to school. Get a good job. Date and marry a responsible man. Have children. Everything had worked out well until she found herself standing at the altar with a man she couldn’t say “I do” to when the wedding was interrupted.
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Anuli held a strong belief that a woman should be married and have children by the time she turns 30. When she reached that milestone without achieving either, her desperation to find a husband began to cloud her judgment and she neglected truly getting to know potential partners or ask them important questions.
This leads her to the disastrous decision of agreeing to marry an already-married man, who concealed that fact from her. The wedding crashed as the man's wife appeared right before Anuli said "I do," exposing his true identity and intentions.
Iriah, Anuli’s best friend, whisked her devastated friend away on a vacation to the Obudu Cattle Ranch. There, she developed feelings for the event planner, Etim. However, after spending time together and even sharing a kiss, he revealed he was married. This revelation sent Anuli deeper into a depressive state, feeling like she had a pattern of being attracted to married men.
Despite her feelings, Anuli put her personal life aside to help her best friend plan her wedding. This inevitably led to her reencountering Etim but she was able to push her dislike for him aside for her friend's sake, which surprisingly led to Etim opening up more about himself and his past life.
A visit to her parents brought Anuli another unexpected shock. Overhearing a conversation, Anuli discovered her mother was having an affair with her father's best friend, and this put a strain on her relationship with her mother. This revelation, surprisingly, gave Anuli the courage to reach out to Etim again.
She agreed to date him, despite his still-existing marriage to a woman from his past. She saw their situation as proof that perfect marriages didn't exist. Their relationship blossomed, but forgiving her mother remained a struggle for Anuli. Meeting Etim's Irish mother, however, brought her warmth and acceptance.
After seven months of dating, Etim decided to come clean about his dark past of drugs and being a driver for a notorious criminal. He wanted to face the future without guilt and planned to turn himself in to the authorities. However, Anuli had a different plan; she paid off his estranged wife to stop her from using his past as blackmail. Unfortunately, the wife demanded more money, solidifying Etim's resolve to face the consequences and sever ties with Anuli to keep her out of further harm.
Tragedy struck when Anuli's father, suffering from Alzheimer's disease, was hospitalized after a major stroke. Sadly, he passed away a few days later. This loss brought a harsh reminder of the importance of family and Anuli finally reconciled with her mother in their shared grief.
A brighter turn came with Etim's court verdict. He received community service instead of jail time, a huge weight lifted from his heart. Seeing Anuli in the courtroom filled him with joy, and they rekindled their romance. In her father's memory, Anuli ran an Alzheimer's disease awareness marathon to raise funds and awareness, bringing together people with loved ones suffering from the disease, and sharing their stories.
At a celebratory party following the marathon, Etim plans to propose. This time, Anuli knew she wasn't saying yes to fulfill a life goal, but because she truly loved and adored Etim. The journey of "I don't" led her to self-discovery, forgiveness, and ultimately, a love unlike any she had envisioned. A beautiful story indeed.
Have you read this book? What did you think about it? Kindly leave a comment.
If you read this book after reading this review, come back and share 😊